How can I know where God is calling me?

First, we must lay down the groundwork:

1.    Don’t allow life to pass you by without reflecting on it. There is a lot of noise in our surrounding and we seem to need it, because if it isn’t the MP3 player going off, it’s the television, the Internet, the video games… Do you have the guts to sit in silence for just a little while?
2.    Think about what is happening in your life. Not in what could have happened or how you would like things to have happened, but in how they occurred in reality. Did you learn something from it?
3.    Carry a journal with you. Expressing your feelings will help you to clarify things.
4.    Pray a little every day. In reality, discernment is about listening.
5.    Acknowledge your strong points and limitations. Making a list of your valiant and weak points could help you.
6.    Come into contact with what it is that you really want.

Discernment process:

Discernment is a process of discovering God’s direction and it guides us toward the concrete reality of our daily lives.
1.    Become informed of each option you have before you. For example what is matrimony, single life, religious life and the priesthood. What are the positive things in each one of these? What would you have to give up by following any one of these?
2.    Take the option you feel more inclined toward, and make a list of the reasons for picking this one and the reasons against it.
3.    Consider your options in prayer. St. Ignatius observed that the Spirit of God acts to give courage, joy, and inner peace to the person who tries to respond generously to the love of God. The spirit of evil, on the other hand, discourages, brings anxiety and fear. If the option before you brings a sense of peace, maybe God is affirming it for you. If it makes you worry, then maybe God is directing you toward another direction. Where do you feel peace, joy, inspiration and hope?
Discernment is the convergence of many factors: the person you are, your deepest desires, what you have learned about the other options you feel drawn to, and the affective responses that accompany them.

Examine of conscience:

This is a method to reflect in a prayerful manner about your life today. Make time for a quiet space and take 15 minutes to reflect on the following questions:

•    Begin by asking the Holy Spirit to guide you in a sincere reflection about your day.
•    Remember the gifts and blessing of the day; the things you are grateful for.
•    Reflect how God has been present in the events, experiences, gatherings and emotions of the day. How did you find Jesus among the people and events of the day?  How did God call you to respond to these gatherings?
•    How did you respond to the opportunities and calls from God during this day? How did you respond to the people God put in your way today?
•    Tell God that you have repented for those moments in which you did not respond to his calls and opportunities.
•    Reflect on the particular ways God is calling you to grow at this moment.
•    Ask for the gift to find Jesus in your experiences and gathering, of listening to God’s callings tomorrow, and responding to them.

What is a vocation?

When you’re in love or you really like somebody, you’re always looking for that person, eager to be close to him or her. Well the same can be said about God. Since God loves us, he always wants us to be close and he calls us by our name, as if we had nothing else to do. Often we say that “there is lack of vocations,” but in fact what we really mean it is that there is a lack of vocations to the priesthood or to religious life.

There cannot be a lack of vocations because there are just as many vocations as the number of baptized. God calls each of us to our own particular way of life, in pursuit of the living one who is Jesus. The word vocation comes from Latin “vocare” which means to call. And God always calls. According to an important theologian of the church, vocation is the call to a stable way of life that is directed to maintain grace in this world and reach the glory of God.

So is marriage a vocation? It certainly is! According to that definition, since marriage is a stable way of living and it is a sacrament, which grants grace, marriage is certainly a vocation. God calls married couples to live their love and construct their small domestic church from the familiar daily life. Just like any other, the vocation of marriage is not easy. According to Father Rainieri, this “state entails great obligations, tough trials, and much difficulties.”

Marriage is not just about a pretty wedding, but a very serious commitment. When the words are spoken: in good times and bad, in sickness and in health, at that moment because of the tremendous happiness of the wedding, it is easy to think those times are never going to come. The truth is human life is filled with difficulties. And living with another person is never easy. It is necessary to love each other a lot in order to tolerate the odd habits or customs that may appear weird because it was done differently in our family, which had a completely different personality. You must love each other a lot in order to survive those difficult moments, engage in a dialogue, and continue to realize the sacrament (the sign of grace that realizes what it means) on a day-to-day basis.

One does not enter marriage just because everyone else is doing it and because “you don’t feel you have a vocation,” but precisely because you have it. It is a call to achieve God’s mission in the vitally important atmosphere that is the nuclear family.

The call to the marriage is not only a romantic inclination towards another person, nor the desire—although noble—of having children. The call to marriage is an acceptance of the responsibility to create, along with God, a better world by building indestructible ties of love, and the education and upbringing of human beings who also accept the call to change the world.